It's convenient to blame Disney's ESPN X-Games, Big Brother Magazine, The Industry, scooters, skateboarders, whatever happened to? Old Pro's pointlessly publicized "OMG used to be a rollerblader!!!" artfgt rebirth, Michelob Ultra, or the Human Giant Sketch. But all they've ever been are distracting, mildly depressing externalities: easy excuses. Blaming childhood heroes or "skateboarding" for Barely Death is much simpler and makes everyone feel better.

In reality, the descent has been a slow one, guided by internal failure on the smallest scale imaginable.

With the seventh anniversary of Get Someone To Blade Day fast approaching, it's ...